Dear Santy/Angela, I’ve been a good boy all year and done everything you’ve asked. Please may I have an Xbox, interest rate reduction and a surprise. Thanks Michael:)

I wish Bosco and I were still best friends, times were simpler then.

I.O.U. 100 billion euro

Looks like he’s doing a quick calculation:

“€132,709,700,000 x … Ah jasus lads, we’re ballixed!”

He’s doing up his CV for a job in EASONS.

Dear Jim,
Can you fix it for me to….

Pledge ? …. I prefer Mr Sheen !

He’s writing down the provisional property tax liability, due from the young girl, on her ‘Wendy’ house.

You think I care about you, silly child? I’ve already signed away your future. Hahaha!!!

For sale: beautiful country, comes with gullible voters (I got in! ;) ), free oil, wind and wave power, plentiful supply of firewood, original banking system, No hse, plenty of tax -Quick sale wanted, cash buyers only.. First to see will buy.. May consider part exchange.. Call (10-2 mon-fri (office hours) between sept and may) ask for enda..

“Ich schwöre Dir, Angela Merkel, als Führer und Kanzler des Reiches Treue und Tapferkeit. Ich gelobe Dir und den von Dir bestimmten Vorgesetzten Gehorsam bis in den Tod, so wahr mit Gott helfe.”

So this is your contract of slavery for the rest of your life if you stay here.

And from next May Niamh, you will pay 30% tax on your confirmation money. “You don’t mind Niamh, do you, as me and my colleagues have got used to a certain standard of living and we’re too old to change our ways”

It doesn’t really matter what Noonan is pledging, like every other member of this government his word isn’t worth a damn.

“We put the Brick on the accelerator”

So, with the pocket money tax at 40% you owe me…

There was a bald man from Limerick, who tried to write a good Limerick, when he got stuck he said,”who gives a F#*k” and ran all the way back to Limerick!

“haha, by the time I’m finished, ye won’t have any money to buy new books”

Niamh, do you see this number with all the zero’s? That’s how much money you will have to pay to bail out our banks!

I’m serious chicken, Australia New Zealand or America is where you need to be headin!!!!, this place is fecked!!!!!!!

“100 euro” “Unfortunately young lady I can’t donate much because the country is strapped for cash.”
(The ceiling above gives way; money and jewels pour down on him.)

I’ll sum up our vision for the investment in your educational future in two words, “sorry about that”.

Get into reading, Australia expect basic literacy skills…

Whatever he’s writing is not putting a smile on Niamh’s face anyway.

I pledge to bring the country to the edge – and over it..

“This 10 year old will prob do a better job than me.”!

“I pledge allegiance to Ze Almighty Merkel et al. To implement budgetary cuts and impose taxes and charges on the peasants as they see fit. One sovereign, indivisible, with freedom, and great riches for all elite.”

I pledge to carry on as I have in the past year and as soon as my pension is topped up to a reasonable sum I will let somebody else clean up the mess.
Yours Sincerely.
Mick

Another big novelty cheque for the bondholders?

“fifty shades of grey” by Michael Noonan. ”
A lifetime in Limerick”.

“tax high, spend low” that will do it

This is your new foster home address – your parents did not pay the household property tax. I now have to give your home to a German tourist on a 3 month vacation. Run along now …,

So you’se all snubbed me when I was leader of Fine Gael, now its pay back time.That should ease this big chip on my shoulder. ha!ha! HA!HA!HA!

“…take a left at the dole office go straight to the end of the street go around the corner and probably the corner after that…

WANTED….MONEY OF ANY TENDER….WILL EVEN TAKE FROM YOUR CHILDREN AND ELDERS

hope Niamh doesn’t notice that I don’t have a clue how to spell litteresy.

“I pledge that I will not *uck up this country any more than it is”

In our dreams I think??

He is writing a Proposal for a new tax on writing with blue ink.

Look how easy it is for me to sign away your future…

It was the best of times. Now it’s the worst of times.

with this invisible ink i thee pledge……………………………………….

Then Lenin came and Mick told him how to do things. And that’s the pedigree I am following.

There now! Amn’t I a better writer than Willie O’Dea?

Dear Children of Ireland,

As you know I firmly believe emigration is a lifestyle choice, that none of you will have a choice in. So lets stop wasting money educating you all. Let’s just ship you out from Kindergarten to various parts of the world so you can build their pension reserves. After all the people here won’t need it, that is why we keep “borrowing” from it.

We got elected so now forget everything we gave out about, as we will show you how much worse things can be.

The Right Honourable Michael J. Noonan, Minister for fleecing the tax payer.

Dear Mr Trichet,

We have started to scare the shit out of our citizens, as promised. By the time our, sorry your, budget comes around, in December, we expect them to say the usual, ” sure it could have been worse”. Your humble servant,

hopefully his resignation

Hope they don’t think that I’m actually going to be doing any of these things that I am pledging to do. Found it hard enough to explain away d pre election promises.

His Will?

How much is mammy’s house worth Niamh ?

Mick N woz ere 2012……..

Pledge,
Flash,
Persil,
Milk,
Bread…….

meow meow meow

So Barry has 2 apples but Ann-gela wants 10… feck..

Start saving your pocket money now, because by the time your finished school your parents won’t be able to afford to buy you a tin of beans.

We have a plan in place that will ensure we get the bankers out of the mess were in today, at the expense of your parents and all of their friends.

With numerous budgets still to come I would also advise that you to find a job from 1st class on. As more than likely children will be means tested on their pocket money allowance from their parents.

But look on the bright side, at least we have great summers.

Yours sincerely,

Michael Noonon…

Squiggle………..

The Rules of the Henry Hippo Club:

1st RULE: You do not talk about the HENRY HIPPO CLUB.

2nd RULE: You DO NOT talk about HENRY HIPPO CLUB.

3rd RULE: Bailouts will go on as long as they have to…….

I pledge…I pledge…I pledge..I pledge hmmm…I pledge F**k All really is not my style..Yours insincerely Napoleon Noonan..

cant wait for next election so i can retire and get fat pension

I pledge to cut…. to cut….. to cut…. I pledge to fix…. to fix…. DRRRRR!!!! (It’s actually a scene from a new movie, ‘Liar Liar 2′)

“What I discussed at the Bilderberg meeting in my capacity as Minister for Finance for the Irish People was…”

He is writing… “Sucka’s”

MATT DAMON!

Can we play hangman next? The lads never play with me.

His resignation….

Ah no is that my alarm, was it all a dream !!!

I pledge to steal candy from babies.

Look, this is how I will fcuk the country at the next budget

Now pay attention and I’ll show you how to bleed tax payers dry!

Michael: well Niamh what’ll we hit next? Niamh: I think we’ll hit the schools, no we’ll get Joan to hit health care again I think there’a bit of blood left there.

I promise that I will not raise fees for primary school goers… Signed Santa

He’s signing away the kids future to please his IMF/ECB over lords, the gormless gombeen.

This is the way I signed you into slavery Niamh.

I pledge to continue to pontificate about how much of a financial mire we’re in while continuing to take my hugely over inflated salary. Ha ha Bitches!

I really don’t sound like George Burgess

mmmm! 4 across, In a really bad predicament. F blank blank K blank D. Well I’m stumped on that one!

I love petrol!!!

Once upon a time there was a political party called Fin Gael.

I’m a big TOS*.ER

‘Excuse me young miss, how do you spell pledge?’

All newly minted Euro coins will have a milk chocolatey centre!!! But not white chocolate thats manky!!!

Im not leaving here without those balloon animals.

40% of every penny you ever earn will be paid to support continuing socialization of the private losses incurred by irish banks’ careless gambling.

This is my transcript of what went on in the Bildeberg Meeting. First we ordered our dinner and then we watched a video on all the misery we caused on the world, the best laugh I’ve had in years :) and then we all dressed up as some wierd druid like people and praised an owl-like creature and to finish we all ate some human liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.

He is thinking, ‘Jesus they were right when they said a ten year old could do it better’.

He is writing….Budget 2013

…and this is the amount of money I saved the then government in the Hepatitis C scandal……

Now Niamh I do know your only 9 ,but this is how many thousand you already owe your country DEUTSCHLAND.

“You will be the last child that the state ever pays teachers to educate, or my name isn’t Nooooony.”

“what did charlie mc creevy give cause enda says im on ly to go 20% of that figure”.

this is how much you will have to pay us for your life if you live here

A pledge for a blank cheque.

I pledge to only eat feta cheese from now on

I pledge to learn something about economics this year and to fix my whiny monotone voice so ICANN try and actually talk in a European meeting instead of just whining and not having a clue.

Dear Angela,nI’m just after a nice long break…

so i cant make a quip about expenses,thanks journal.Im off to north korea where there is more freedom of speech!

I pledge to stop dithering and to focus on my job; oh look a puppy… aah puppies

his resignation, with any luck!

Dear nation
I am sorry for making such an awful job of the finances but if you re elect me the next time I vow to do better

And now Niamh this is how you spell PROPERTY TAX.

One law for us in the dail and another for the people outside the golden circle HaHa bringing in the new taxes for ye.

eeny meaney miney mo…

And now Sarah this is how you spell PROERTY TAX

that letter to Cowen from the ECB!

Murray, u sound like a sad old fianna failure

“Michale Noonan”

*points* That’s my name!

Dear Brian,
If I publish the letter from Trichet will you come back and take over.

Sign here kiddo

100 lines I must try harder

We shud have used our brains and voted sinn fein!!

I am God……not a great one mind…

once upon a time the cruel sheriff of Nottingham rand his soldiers took one tenth of all the money his peasants earned.- boy did he have a lot to learn

his resignation, with any luck!

That he is going to ban gun ownership in America.

The 5 x tables

I pledge . . . . . . . that I will not write like some crazed jrunk tiny MONEY spider . . . . . . that is struggling to wield a solid gold pen . . . . . . and failing miserably.

Signed DAMNIT! I just broke another pledge.

‘no little girl, it’s potatoe with an E.’ FAIL

And Michael Noonan writes his pledge of allegiance to the United States of America.

All work and no play makes Mike a dull boy. All work and no play makes Mike a dull boy. All work and no play makes Mike a dull boy.

i swear there is nothing sinister behind those handcuff shaped baloons

I SMELL WEE.

MN: ‘Now is the winter of our discontent…’
Little Kid: ‘What!?! Only now, what planet are you on.’