My wife wrote a book, "The M Word" to address the questions women want to know the answers to, when undergoing surgery for breast cancer. It addresses the issues pertaining to chemotherapy, radiotherapy and the effects of surgery. It covers the roller coaster of emotions, side effects and sexuality.

Originally it was written as a journal for her own therapy, but she was encourage by medical staff to make it available to other woman as essential reading to address the lack of information available.

It details her experience through the Irish health system in Clonmel and Waterford hospitals.

Essential reading for anyone going through chemotherapy and radio therapy, or anybody who has been touched by cancer directly or indirectly.

Having been diagnosed with prostate cancer myself two weeks ago, I’d say there are supports available. In my own case so far, they have been chiefly from the Irish Cancer Society and the ARC Cancer Support Centre in Eccles Street. It is left to the patient, however, to take the initiative to reach out and to follow up. In my own case that’s not a major issue. But I can see how it would be problematic for some. It would be a big help if, upon diagnosis, patients were more proactively referred by the medical team to the Irish Cancer Society for support and preparation for what lies ahead.

Cancer effects the whole family. The strains can become immense. Some families survive the strain some don’t. Some people find chemotherapy a breeze, others find it nearly kills them. I am normally very practical and take things in my stride but the mental anguish and strain I experienced was incredible. No one prepared us, but a few kind friends helped.

A relative of mine, this year died after starting chemotherapy (the first course) He would have died anyway from lung cancer, blue asbestos related. (his prognosis was a year to 18 months) No one offered support or referred him to any organisation. His family helped him by downloading the information about his disease, mesothelioma, suggested getting his affairs in order including a claim against a former employer for negligence, signed a few days before he died. How do I tell someone when "they ask me how long will I live, tell me what you know! The doctors haven’t said anything about my prognosis". I had a leaflet downloaded from DWP.gov.uk. There was only one outcome. There was no cure. Why wasn’t he told? I decided to give him the leaflet because he had a right to know so that he could make best use of the couple of weeks that he had left.

There is a great need for practical advice rapidly accessible at one spot available for all at diagnosis, not asap after. Not everyone is well enough to do the research themselves nor have any relatives to help.

Fortunately my wife will soon be counted a survivor, but the lack of energy, check ups and hormone suppression tablets is ongoing. She volunteered her services at a cancer support meeting but was told publicly, " sorry , you can’t, you’re not yet a survivor." That was the last straw so hence her book to help others. A one stop practical informative guide of her experiences and anecdotes from others as well, she was brave enough to name doctors and patients. Health professionals who patients didn’t feel happy with were also identified by circumstantial Information. Some things changed hopefully as a result of her hard work.

We found no leaflets or publications offered to fill our need. I felt as though we were adrift in a large ocean in a small boat without a compass, briefly touching land for a shot of chemotherapy before being dumped back in the ocean.

She made some good cancer patient friends and sadly a few died.

Life has changed forever it will never be the same, but we appreciate our marriage far more. What a survivor she is!

No broadband available either at that time where we lived!

Over my treatment a year now and like my friend above I contacted the Irish cancer society who were more than helpful and put me in touch with people who had gone through my particular treatment ,ie hormone therapy and radiotherapy and the the help I got was invaluable ,I think you have to make the first move yourself and after that you will find that there is a wealth of help out there .