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13 hilariously awful life tips found in magazines

Good advice! Not.

TOP TIP: DON’T follow these tips.

1. Ladies, gently stab your man with a fork.

He’ll love it.

2. “The sugary texture of your tongue will add an interesting new dimension.”

3. Burn him with piping hot candle wax!

cosmo Reddit Reddit

4. Don’t have a hair tie? Use a thong.

thonghairtie Jezebel Jezebel

*shakes head*

5. They “look cool”, do they?

6. Flirt with your man by accusing his Dad of coming on to you.

cosmo2 unkamatt / Tumblr unkamatt / Tumblr / Tumblr

7. “Elegant” might be stretching it.

8. Very cool look.

cosmo3 Reddit Reddit

Such chic, such fashion.

9. Well, if he says it.

blogger-image-1629486308 heroofswitzerland.com heroofswitzerland.com

*stuffs €3 Penneys necklace in toilet roll, forgets about it immediately*

10. Nope.

blogger-image--2085041649 heroofswitzerland heroofswitzerland

11. Just some normal dinner chat.

cosmo sex tip 3 dontpaniconline dontpaniconline

Couldn’t be construed as mildly threatening/aggressive at all.

12. Here lads, don’t be donating to those pesky charities.

blogger-image--964055778 heroofswitzerland heroofswitzerland

Just keep the collection bag for yourself and you’ll come out of the situation looking real good. 

13. Finally, we don’t even know what to say about this.

TT197 heroofswitzerland heroofswitzerland

We’ll take your word for it, Davina.

32 perfect observations about every Irish county’s accent >

The 7 horrors of the office Secret Santa >

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56 Comments
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    Mute Ciarán
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    Sep 4th 2014, 7:22 PM

    I’ll reserve judgement till after I see what they actually do but the chronological, unfiltered nature of the feed is the reason I use twitter and don’t have a Facebook account. If they change it too much there’s a good chance that I’ll just leave

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    Mute Wheres My Nama
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    Sep 5th 2014, 8:12 AM

    no you won’t

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    Mute Darren Doheny
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    Sep 4th 2014, 7:14 PM

    I absolutely hate seeing stupid tweets from advert type users!

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    Mute Dermot M******
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    Sep 4th 2014, 7:22 PM

    Me too. Which is why I block and report them as spam. Everyone one of them.

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    Mute Phillip Hogan
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    Sep 4th 2014, 7:35 PM

    But how will this help me to troll people?

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    Mute Firas
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    Sep 4th 2014, 10:51 PM

    Twitter’s search is heaven in comparison to fb’s unmitigated disaster.

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    Mute Sean Lee
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    Sep 4th 2014, 7:18 PM

    Twitter? More like poo

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    Mute PerkyBeans
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    Sep 4th 2014, 5:24 PM

    Wow..Massive tease…. Almost have a caps lock goin on… (•_•)

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