HOW TO SURVIVE the festive season as a singleton…
Say yes to everything
There is no better time of year to go out there and socialise. The reasons are twofold – Christmas can be ruddy lonely if you’re feeling the effects of not having a significant other to snuggle up to, so filling up your calendar with opportunities to be surrounded by friends and family will take the edge off and remind you that you’re not ACTUALLY alone; secondly, December is the month where everyone is in the mood for romance – everywhere you go you’ll be surrounded by other singletons eager to meet their perfect match and have a sneaky kiss under the mistletoe.
Fill up your calendar with every event, celebration, lunch, dinner or drinks you are invited to. Whether you’re dating in Dublin, Cork or anywhere else, every bar/restaurant/club is full of prospects, so immerse yourself in good cheer and get involved. You never know when Mr or Ms Right will stumble across your path, so attending every opening of every envelope is mandatory during the festive season – sitting in and catching up on X-Factor equals an opportunity well and truly missed!
Always look your best
When you walk outside the door each day, assume there’s always someone looking at you, because there always is. That’s why this tip is not just for Christmas. Sweats are for the gym, pyjamas are for bed. How do you feel when you’re wearing your cosy tracksuit? Comfy? Yes. Sexy? No!
When you’re leaving the house you should dress like you’re going for dinner with your ex (the one that got away). You’ll look amazing, so you’ll feel amazing. You’ll wear that confidence all over you and there’s nothing as irresistible to the opposite sex as confidence. You should always endeavour to be the best version of yourself that you possibly can be. Assume there’s always someone paying attention – there usually is.
Exercise
You’ll be busy but make time to exercise regularly. In December you’ll be tucking into all manner of four course meals before topping them all off with Gluhweins and Irish coffees. Between the goose fat roasties and the brandy butter one can notch up the pounds at breakneck speed.
Make sure you keep feeling fit and healthy so you can enjoy all the epic feeds guilt-free. You’ll also feel happier, sleep better and have more energy to stay out late!
If you see someone you fancy – approach
Nonchalance only gets you one thing – a cold bed, alone! If you spot someone you fancy across a crowded bar, don’t just glance, clutch your glass closer to your chest and turn away. Aloof is for losers. Look for the signs that they are interested: hold eye contact and if it lingers for longer than five seconds then this is the green light to make contact.
If he or she smiles at you after catching your eye then chances are you’re in. The worst that can happen is that they are not available or interested but that is only one person’s opinion of you. You never know, they may be the love of your life! If a person likes you enough to approach you then be kind – if you’re not interested then let them down gently, being rude or mean makes you a much smaller person. Opportunities aren’t just confined to bars either, try online dating sites or a matchmaker and get active on the dating scene, at least you’ll be sure everyone you approach or meet is actually looking for a partner too!
Make yourself available for dates
Now that you’re dressed to kill and looking your svelte best after your cross-fit class, you’re feeling sexy, surrounded by fairy lights and bathed in the soft glow of confidence. You’re surrounded by friends, having fun and you’ve attracted the attention of an admirer.
You’ve held eye contact, giving them the green light to approach, so they do. Be open, friendly and positive. Don’t fall into the RomCom trap and expect sparks of electricity to surge through your body at first glance. Love at first sight is a bit of a nonsense because it’s so rare. Love takes time to grow and develop so give them a chance if they seem nice and fit some of your criteria for a match. You can always call time on it after three or four dates if it’s not going anywhere.
If they ask for your number, give it – and when they contact you make yourself available for a date. One of the biggest reasons that people find it hard to meet anyone is that they don’t carve out time in their busy schedule to date. You don’t want to be calling a dating agency five years from now having regretfully missed out on great potential partners because you were too “busy” at the time to devote any time to meeting them.
If you haven’t got one free night in seven to meet someone for a few drinks then you need to address your work/life balance. Life is short, it’s hard to meet the perfect match – they won’t fall into your lap. Dating takes time and effort, but it’s so worth it when that hard work pays off…
Merry Christmas and happy dating!
Rena Maycock is the Director of Intro Matchmaking.
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