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8 skills you need to run for election according to these campaign videos

Fine Gael’s campaign videos for its six MEP candidates are nice productions, but bizarre in places….

FINE GAEL HAS produced a series of smart-looking YouTube videos showcasing its European election candidates ahead of the vote on 23 May.

There is pleasant and uplifting music and lots of iconic-looking shots of the four men and two women who want to represent the party in the European Parliament.

The videos are short, sharp and say nice things about all the candidates, but there are a few bizarre moments in each which led us to come up with this list of essential tips you should take note of if you’re running for office.

1. Master the ability to gaze longingly into the distance: 

Exhibit A: Brian Hayes at the Convention Centre in Dublin. It helps if you can do it from a considerable height:

Brian Hayes 5 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

If you’ve got a companion to do it with you then all the better. Seán Kelly enlisted this cow:

Sean Kelly 4 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

But doing it alone has a certain charm as well. Here’s the back of Simon Harris’s head. He’s on a beach, staring at the sea:

Simon Harris 3 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

In fact staring out over water is a good look particularly if you’ve just come from somewhere… on your bicycle. Check out Jim Higgins:

Jim Higgins 3 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

Finally, why limit yourself to earth when you can look to the sky like Mairead McGuinness:

MMGuinness 4 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

But, wait! What’s that she’s looking at? Why it’s the great EPP logo in the sky.

Like the bat signal. Sort of:

MMGuinness 5 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

2. Get the celebrity endorsement

Hayes benefits from a glowing eulogy from none other than Finance Minister Michael Noonan who, using his excited voice (which is coincidently the same as his happy, angry, and sad voice) says the Dublin candidate has been “absolutely terrific”.

Brian Hayes 1 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

We don’t hear anything from GAA boss Davy Fitz, but he’s happy to pose for a snap with Seán Kelly:

Sean Kelly 2 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

3. Get the hand gestures right

“How much work are you gonna do in Brussels, Brian?”

“This much”:

Brian Hayes 3 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

Look at Noonan. He’s delighted. Absolutely terrific, as he’d say himself.

4. Appeal to as many voters as possible

Seán Kelly, a former GAA president, is pictured here standing on a soccer pitch, in front of a rugby stadium, throwing a Gaelic football.

All he’s missing is a hurley to hit the Gaelic football. Masterful.

Sean Kelly 1 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

5. Your mode of transport says a lot about what kind of politician you are

Like Jim ‘I want to ride my bicycle/I want to ride my bike…’ Higgins:

Jim Higgins 1

Or Seán Kelly. He has a tractor and he’s not afraid to drive it.

Sean Kelly 3 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

Look at that steely determination on his face, that field is getting ploughed.

6. Speaking of which, facial expressions are crucial

If there is a candidate in Ireland South or anywhere in the country who can cock an eyebrow as well as Simon Harris we’d like to meet them:

Simon Harris 5 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

7. It’s all about the props 

But while Harris may have a nice white, fluffy dog…

Simon Harris 4 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

… it’s no match for Mairead McGuinness’s feeding skills:

MMGuinness 3 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

8. Repeating the message is communicating the message

Deirdre Clune says ‘Cork’ not once, not twice, but 10 times in the space of less than 90 seconds in her video:

Deirdre Clune 5 Source: Screengrab via Fine Gael

Watch all the videos here > 

Read: Someone’s had a little fun with a Luke ‘Ming’ Flanagan poster in Roscommon

On The Trail: 7 odd, weird and wonderful things from Election 2014

About the author:

Hugh O'Connell

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