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VOICES

Parenting Tips for supporting children and young people with body image issues

Fiona Flynn of Bodywhys has some helpful advice for parents and guardians of young children and teens.

BODY IMAGE ISSUES are increasingly common in people of all ages, both male and female and particularly in children and young people.

This is perhaps not surprising as young people today are thought to ‘see more images of physical perfection in one day than their parents or grandparents might have seen in their entire teenage years’. Research indicates that media, peers and social media are key influences on body image.

Research we conducted at Bodywhys in collaboration with Maynooth University and funded by the Irish Research Council (2015, 2018) found that Irish teens describe wishing they could look like the slim, flawless ideal they see for females and the muscular, flawless ideal they see for males.

Children are exposed to media messaging and cultural ideals of beauty more frequently and earlier than ever before and as such, body image concerns seem to be occurring earlier, often before parents might expect.

Unchecked, body image issues can lead to negative mental health outcomes such as depression, anxiety or eating disorders. Unfortunately, research indicates that eating disorders are increasing and that rates of eating disorders in preteens have doubled in recent years. Research also shows that programmes to promote positive body image in children and adolescents should ideally also include a focus on parental involvement.

Self-awareness

There is much that parents can do to promote positive body image however sometimes it can be challenging to know where to start. Our children are growing up with media influences which we did not have as children. Children absorb information from the world around them. As a parent, you can support your child to develop a positive body image by talking openly about the images that we see in the media and teaching children that what we see is not real.

We can also challenge media messaging which links self-worth to being thin, muscular or looking a certain way by teaching children that body image is only one part of who we are.

We can do this by being conscious of how we speak about people and bodies ourselves. If we speak often about appearance, comment on how people look or express dissatisfaction with our own bodies we give the message that appearance is what matters. If, however, we talk about confidence, happiness or enjoyment of life or focus on personal qualities such as kindness, good fun, etc children learn that life satisfaction and personal qualities are valued.

Start to consider how you speak about your own body and that of others in front of children. Try to avoid discussing diet, calories, weight loss or body building in front of children.

You are your child’s first role model. Role model the body positive behaviour you would like for them. As much as possible, try to be kind to your own body in the language that you use and in the ways that you nourish and move your body focusing on health rather than weight.

Encouraging body appreciation

Encourage your child to appreciate all of the positive physical things that their body can do for them. Tell your child regularly that body image makes up only one part of who they are and there are lots of other positive attributes that make a person the unique individual they are.

Support your child to see that happy confident people come in all shapes and sizes.

It might be helpful to spend time with your child identifying positive ‘real life’ role models that they can look up to, perhaps someone in your local community who is happy and enjoying life.

Media and body image

It can be difficult to know where to start in talking to your child about media pressures. As a parent, it’s likely you grew up without a smartphone or daily social media and navigating a conversation on these influences might require some thought.

Social media can be an important way for young people to connect with their peers. It can also be a valuable way for young people to pursue interests or tap into communities online that may not be available to them in real life, it can however also be a negative influence, particularly on body image.

The steady stream of idealised body shape and lifestyle content presented on social media can encourage us to compare ourselves at any age and feel that we don’t measure up.

Young people are particularly susceptible to these pressures. As a parent, you can support your child by approaching conversations about media and social media in a positive way and empowering them to consider how to use social media in ways that promote positive effects on well-being, and social connectedness and lessen the negative effects. A helpful initial step might be to consider your own influences online:

  • Log into your social media account and scroll through your feed mindfully, noticing what you see, read, or hear, and how it makes you feel.
  • Take note of the accounts that make you compare yourself negatively and unfollow, mute or hide these.
  • Take note of any other ads, pop-ups or influences during searches online, how these make you feel and how you can block negative content.
  • Monitor your experience online over the next few days for any changes.
  • Talk to your child about the changes you have made to your social media account and/or online and consider any positive changes that could be made to promote a more positive experience online for you both. They may have additional ideas to support you in reducing ad content or pop-ups online.
  • Keep the lines of communication open so that you and your child can discuss social media, media and online influences on well-being in a supportive way.

Bodywhys has a range of supports for schools including evidence-informed programmes for secondary schools and primary schools to promote positive body image which have been developed in collaboration with mental health professionals, teachers and young people. We also have a dedicated body image website with information for parents, educators and young people. 

Fiona Flynn is a Youth Development Manager at Bodywhys – The Eating Disorders Association of Ireland. You will find useful information on promoting positive body image in children and young people on www.bodywhysbodyimage.ie. You will find useful information on supporting people with eating disorders here: www.bodywhys.ie. For further information please contact info@bodywhys.ie.

VOICES