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E.T.: "I'll be right here." The White House: "Not so much." (c) Universal Studios via IMDB
aliens

White House forced to deny extra-terrestrial 'cover-up'

An official petition on the White House website forces a senior communications official to deny a Roswell-style cover-up.

THE WHITE HOUSE has been forced to officially deny the existence of a ‘cover-up’ of alien life, after thousands of people signed a public petition on its website demanding that the government disclose all knowledge of alien life.

The official denials, given by a senior communications official within Barack Obama’s administration, came after thousands signed two petitions on the White House’s new ‘We The People’ petitions microsite.

Over 12,000 people signed one petition asking the administration to “formally acknowledge an extraterrestrial presence engaging the human race”, while over 5,000 signed a companion petition to “immediately disclose the government’s knowledge of, and communications with, exterterrestrial beings”.

“Hundreds of military and government agency witnesses have come forward with testimony confirming this extraterrestrial presence,” the former petition said.

Opinion polls now indicate more than 50% of the American people believe there is an extraterrestrial presence and more than 80% believe the government is not telling the truth about this phenomenon. The people have a right to know. The people can handle the truth.

The scale of support for the two petitions led Phil Larson, who oversees the White House’s space exploration policy, to post a written response saying there was no evidence of life beyond Earth, “or that an extraterrestrial presence has contacted or engaged any member of the human race.”

Larson also wrote that there was “no credible information to suggest that any evidence is being hidden from the public’s eye” – but said the current evidence was not enough to stop the government from continuing a search for life on other planets.

While it was statistically likely that there was other life elsewhere in the universe, he said, it was equally likely that given the large distances involved it may never be possible to make contact with another race.

“But that’s all statistics and speculation. The fact is we have no credible evidence of extraterrestrial presence here on Earth,” Larson wrote.

The petitions feature on the WhiteHouse.gov website was launched two months ago, and theoretically requires petitions to accrue 25,000 signatures within 30 days in order to trigger an official White House response.

Among other petitions currently featuring on the website asking the administration to “stop lying” (548 signatures), “stop all foreclosures and evictions” (583 signatures), and “recognise the Syrian National Council” (3,656 signatures).

Another popular petition at present demands “a vapid, condescending, meaningless, politically safe response to this petition” – with its 8,847 signatories also saying they would like the White House to give them a cookie.

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