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If you've got 99 problems, your relationship is probably one*

*Statistically speaking, it’s pretty likely.

Image: Shutterstock

A SURVEY HAS found that relationships are the most frequently upsetting aspect in Irish people’s lives, more so than money problems or family arguments.

Samaritans are today launching a new campaign called #TalkToUs in an attempt to give people a new outlet for their troubles.

Research that accompanies the campaign has looked at the day-to-day things that have gotten to people over the last year.

The top five in order are:

  • Relationships (45.7%)
  • A big life event (45%)
  • Income (41.5%)
  • Family arguments (38.7%)
  • Physical health (35.8%)

Work (35.1%), home life (32.9%) and mental health (29.7%) also ranked highly.

As well as looking at the causes of upset among people, the survey also sought to find out the reasons why some people choose not to seek help with their problems.

One in four people say they don’t feel like they have anyone to share their problems with. More than 1 in 6 people said they bottle it up their problems or keep them to themselves and 1 in 8 avoid people and spend time alone.

The main reason people gave for not opening up about their feelings are embarrassment or fears that they will be judged.

“Recognising your need to talk is a strength,” says Samaritans chair and volunteer Jenni McCartney.

Everyone’s different and what one person might cope with can easily overwhelm another.

Worryingly, adolescents and young people (aged 16-24) are the most likely to ‘bottle things up’ or spend time alone when something is bothering them but conversely are also the group who feel that they themselves are ‘good listeners’.

Catherine Brogan of Samaritans Ireland says people who come to the charity for help may not solve their problems immediately but start a process of helping themselves.

“Even if their problem couldn’t be resolved by the end of their exchange with us, simply the process of sharing was sometimes enough to start the process of healing, leading to taking positive action or seeking other forms of help.”

If you want to speak to the Samaritans you can do so around the clock by phoning 116 123 or visiting their website.

Read: We need to recognise that emotional wellbeing is linked to early childhood experiences >

Read: ‘Just by being there for a friend, we can keep life itself’ >

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About the author:

Rónán Duffy

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