Well said.

there’s no rape jokes on the page. comparing it to making child molestation jokes is invalid.

in fact the only thing shown here today, which is prevalent on both sides is:

feminism is seeking to get equality for both genders by specifically focusing on one of them, and ignoring the other.

I didn’t say they were rape jokes Risteard. Nor did I compare them specifically to “child molestation” jokes — just jokes on stories that are about child molestation. Please take the time to read my comment.

Your “1 billion out of the kitchen” line was in poor taste.
Micky Malone’s “No harm in givin women the odd skite to keep them in line….like when they dont have ur dinner on the table when ya get in from work or when they speak wen the footies on” was in poor taste.
Diarmuid O’Brien’s “@cabk …you lost me on ur 4th sentence..zzzzzzz” was in poor taste.
Michael Byrne’s gem, “Make sure all you men don’t stand on any women’s toes when dancing as it could be classed as abuse” was in poor taste.
Kinect1c’s comment that female abuse is somehow “more marketable” than male abuse was disgusting, as was the follow-up suggestion that a similar protest for violence against men should be called a “penis soliloquay”.

My comparison is perfectly valid. Stories that discuss the abuse of children (or, for that matter, of men, infrequent and all as they are) do not attract h the kind of flippancy shown by some of the speakers here. To me, that says a lot about the attitude of some to violence, sexual or otherwise, against adult women.

What rubbish. If you believe statistics like 1 in 3 women get raped you will believe anything. Tell me something, who is doing the raping? Is 1 out of every 3 men/boys rapists? Or is it the same men going around and raping your wives and girlfriends? Or maybe its the same women claiming rape numerous times? Or maybe its feminist/womens organisations which bloat rape numbers so as to get more funding and keep themsleves in a job. Maybe even these numbers are skewed because females can’t actually be accused of rape in certain countries including Ireland. So if you had to gather statistics of rape in Ireland you would have ZERO rapes committed by females simply because the law of the land does not recognise a female rapist. Females without a doubt are the most protected and pampered creatures on the face of this planet.

I think you meant to reply to someone else there mypolitics1. But your comment is a bit ridiculous.

Thats a fair point. I think if you understood the satirical nature of my post, you’d viewit differently, especially since on many ocassions i support said street dance. Ive madeit clearthat misandry is my main issue, but one needs jokes.

My politics – women believe the 1 in 3 statistics because they are true. For example why do I believe it? Well because already (I am in my early twenties) in my group of five close friends one has been raped and one has been sexually abused as a child.

That’s 2 in 5 out of my own group of friends and that’s just the ones I know about.

You are a disgusting individual.

Additionally Risteard – you said you don’t take the statistics I stated in my comment. Do you believe my two friends? Do you think they are ‘creating spin’ or ‘agenda driven’.

This happens and has happened to a woman you know whether you want to believe it or not. Creating pathetic excuses, ignoring it and twisting the story around to ‘why aren’t we talking about men’ will not change that.

Ive no basis to believe you whatsoever. I could give you personal accounts of domestic violence and rape against men and youve only my word, which youve give as much creedance and I would yours. I could tell you about one of my friends who was in court over it znd was practicallytold it was impossible to be rsped, but again, youve only my word.

I appreciate that it’s satirical. Generally speaking, I love a bit of satire and sarcasm. I just don’t think it’s appropriate for this particular piece, and it doesn’t seem to crop up elsewhere. (PS, did you see the comment further down ? “Uh oh we hav alot of women on their periods over here”?). These comments don’t appear to crop up on other, equally serious news reports.
While I don’t agree with your understanding of feminist principles, I DO think we are in agreement about the most important issue here: Violence, whether against men, women, or children, is wrong.

And i didnt twist or change any story. I fully support thr dance.

@B collins yes it was a reply to you because you seem to believe in ridiculously false statistics.

Jeez. Those comments are ignorant, insulting, and stupid. Would these ‘men’ make jokes if it was their daughter, mother, or sister that was getting slapped around, raped or abused!!!

@mypolitics1, I didn’t even make reference to the 1-in-3 stats. So I don’t know where you’re getting that from. I referenced the 1-in-4 stat for child sex abuse. Read my comment. Also do you have any proof that the UN is deliberately bloating rape stats just to “keep a few people in a job”? I’m sorry, that’s ridiculous. I have more reason to believe the UN than I do to believe you.

I’d imagine the 1-in-3 figure comes from a combination of unpleasant scenarios and factors — number of women, number of men, number of attacks, frequency of attacks, period of time, etc., all averaged to give an overall number (I could wrong about that). So, in a global context, with so many wars and disputes being waged in places where women are demeaned on a daily basis, I’d believe 1 in 3.

Your laughable claim that women are the most pampered creatures in the world is pointless and unscientific. Find something better to contribute to the debate than that kind of embittered statement.

I would believe those stats, seeing as I only know ONE woman who hasn’t been raped or beaten..

Believe it or not there are some guys out there who don’t understand that their girlfriends / wives aren’t obligated to have sex with them whenever they demand it. You know, if you ask and the answer is “no”, or “not tonight”, then that doesn’t mean try to talk her around, it doesn’t mean start groping her (because that’s obviously gonna get her in the mood), it doesn’t mean guilt trip her, it doesn’t mean start calling her names, it doesn’t mean start shouting and screaming at her until she’s in tears and gives in just so that you will stop, it doesn’t mean hold her down and do it anyway, and it doesn’t mean wait til she’s asleep and do it then..

You’d be surprised how many guys don’t know that..

What’s a flash mob???
Anything to do with a load of lads on rain macs indecently exposing themselves in public?
If so, sign me up.

@ hannah, the above in in reply to you I forgot to hit reply icon.

i support you Carol.

Facts are facts Barney r, men who have been abused domestically are in a minority. No-one is undermining the situation by saying this. You can’t change facts- the sky is blue,the grass is green….I wish all the men complaining were as passionate about HUMAN rights in general! It only seems to be when an article like this is written or when it focuses in on women that you get stirred up. Like CABK said, this is not a men vs. women issue. ‘this isn’t fair because it’s about women, not men’ shouldn’t be your first thoughts….your first thought should be ’1 in 3 women will be raped in their lifetime. That’s a whole load of people I’m on this planet with, suffering needlesly. this needs to stop’.

Totally agree with you Laura. I’ve seen it first hand. Men who hit women should be put down.

same for women who hit men?

which is a vastly unreported crime in this country.

all power to the protest by the way. anything against violence is only a good thing. and from the articles, its not directly aimed at men causing the rape and violence… since women never rape other women and domestic violence doesn’t occur in lesbian relationships.

Risteard. Care to provide some figures? Perhaps it’s not the focus but the intention is there, it’s about violence and rape against women – the perpetrators aren’t mentioned, but if a substantial amount was perpetrated by women then I’m sure it’s implied..

a group called pairty did a study in 2010 that showed at least 40% of victims of domestic abuse are men. take it for what you want.

my question is really does she feel these women should be put down like their violent male counterparts.

I can’t speak for whomever you were asking, but if a woman beats the crap out of her partner then she deserves the exact same punishment as a guy who does same in my opinion.
Pity is – the guys don’t really get punished, so this means the women won’t either :(

It’s not as marketable

Do a dance and call it the penis soliloquy

It’s funny how irate you all get when women demand their rights >< The fact is that violence and discrimination against women has been going on since the dawn of times….violence towards men? Not so much. That's not to say that it shouldn't be taken as seriously but we need to prioritise. Imagine a 12 year old girl being raped and then getting pregnant…….bit worse than a man getting a punch around the head!!! It also happens waaaaaay more. This event is prioritising those young girls, I think you can understand why.

Not to undermine the suffering of male abuse victims, but nowhere near 1 in 3 men will be raped or beaten in their lifetime.

Honestly, alot of male posters here need a change in attitude. Its pathetic and also almost scary that you read an article that says 1 in 3 women will be raped this evokes no emotion in you at all. All you care about is why men are not mentioned in the article. I have seen this any time a similar article on violence or abuse against women is posted – all male commentators coming out who couldn’t care less except to say the article should be about men instead.

Nobody is saying that men don’t suffer from domestic violence or rape. But the FACTS and STATISTICS show that the level of rape and domestic violence against men is nowhere near as large as that against women. So this day to highlight this level of abuse was organised BY WOMEN to do something about it.

Nobody is stopping you from organizing a similar event in solidarity with other men so if you feel so strongly about this why don’t you be proactive and organize one for males? I’m sure that when you do the journal would be happy to highlight your cause in an article. But this article is about the rape and violence against women that occurs worldwide on a daily basis.

Additionally have you commented previously on the articles about abuse towards those puppies that were found/rescued in the van and asked why there is no mention of violence and abuse of horses and cats? Have you commented on the articles about Syria and asked why there is no mention of the continuing upheaval in Egypt and Tunisia? Have you commented on the articles about child obesity and immediately ranted on about why obesity in adults isn’t mentioned? As these are all important issues but have not been discussed in every article on a similar topic.

Or is it just articles on women that you feel are so unimportant that your reaction is to ask why the article isn’t about men instead?

Here are some statistics on my point that while noone is saying that men do not suffer from domestic violence and rate and that this is terrible, women suffer to a far greater extent. This information is only from Ireland and the UK/US – countries where women have better rights than they do in alot of other countries such as Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Africa, India and they are still shocking.

1 in 7 women in Ireland compared to 1 in 17 men experience severe domestic violence. Women are over twice as likely as men to have experienced severe physical abuse, seven times more likely to have experienced sexual abuse, and are more likely to experience serious injuries than men.
(National Crime Council and ESRI, Domestic Abuse of Women and Men in Ireland, 2005)

90% of the more systematic, persistent and injurious violence that is instrumental in the maintenance of power, is perpetrated by men.
(Male Victims of Domestic Violence: A Substantive and Methodology Research Review, Michael S. Kimmel, 2001)

A major study of police reports and crime surveys in the UK, USA and Canada found that between 90 and 97% of perpetrators of violence in intimate relationships are men.
(Dobash and Dobash, Women, Violence and Social Change, 1992)

In the five years ending in March 2010, more than 312,100 defendants were prosecuted for domestic violence in the UK. 93% of defendants were men and 85% of victims were women.
[Violence against Women Crime Report 2009-2010, UK Crown Prosecution Service]

You should not see any article against women as an attack on yourself. It should make you think that this atrocity could happen to your mother, sister, girlfriend, cousin, friend and you should be delighted that steps are being taken to highlight this with a view to changing it.

Finally, can you look around your group of closest friends and name off those affected by rape or sexual abuse? I can look at my group of five close friends – one rape and one sexual assault.

Please educate yourself and stop seeing this as a women versus men issue. This is simply not the case.

Are you insane? There’s FAR more violence against men than women, it’s just that our society doesn’t mind

85% of murder victims in Ireland are male

That shud work,we will dance them to death..

Can you read Chuck? Or do you just go casting around aspersions about people’s sanity completely out of context?

Just to help you out here is what I said:

Nobody is saying that men don’t suffer from domestic violence or rape. But the FACTS and STATISTICS show that the level of rape and domestic violence against men is nowhere near as large as that against women

Where are you getting this idea that I said men don’t suffer from violence in society at large? In case you also didn’t read the article it is ABOUT rape, sexual assault and domestic violence against women hence why my comment did not include all strands and statistics and opinions on all types of violence against all types of people (men, women and children).

And honestly who have you met who said they ‘don’t mind’ that men are murdered.

I am constantly worried about my brothers on nights out as I know that men are more prone to be attacked in nightclubs etc.

The difference is that when most of the male commentators here see an article that details the prevalence of rape, abuse and domestic violence in our society you couldn’t care less. You don’t comment saying that the one in three could be your mother, sister, wife, girlfriend and its great that women are trying to do something to highlight this with the hopes of preventing even one rape. You only care that men are not mentioned in the article.

It is PATHETIC.

Well said Carol, Laura, CABK. When I clicked on this article the first thought that popped into my head was: “I wonder how long it’ll be before guys come on and starting complaining about why it doesn’t cover violence against men?”

It’s disappointing — not to mention irritating — that almost every article that covers women’s rights/issues/opinons is taken over and trampled by people grumbling and whinging that men’s issues aren’t given any air time. If the story is there, if an event is organised, it will be covered. If you think men’s issues aren’t represented enough in mainstream media, then get off your backsides and do something about it instead of coming on here and drowing an important story with your unconstructive and predictable gripes.

As mentioned by CABK below, none of you ever give out stink about the focus of other articles. The fact that the *only* thing you feel compelled to say in an article about rape and violence against women is that it doesn’t focus on men, speaks volumes about either your immaturity or your disdain for women and girls in general. Either way, it’s pathetic.

while i agree with this dance / protest, i can’t agree with cabk’s use of the stats and saying they’re fact. you’re looking at reports from social sciences and the best thing about them is they’re so open to spin and are usually agenda driven, they unreliable. we actually had a module in college where our sociology professor made up write up two reports based on 5 articles on a topic of our choosing and both reports had to show the opposite conclusions. by all means read your stats, reports and journals, but don’t think them unbiased.

i might actually go to this dance

I reckon the problem is that they just don’t like airtime being given to women’s issues. Men have been the focus throughout history, they have always received precedence and always been the centre of everything.
That’s changing, and some men can’t cope with it..
How dare women rise up and say that the way they have been treated throughout history is wrong? It wasn’t so long ago women were merely men’s possessions..
Perhaps it’s hard for some of the dinosaurs to adjust..

yes… how dare you indeed!

Just want to share this article I enjoyed reading with you, that have a different way of looking at things-
“When discussing gender issues from a male perspective you will often here people talk about a pendulum that has swung too far.
It’s a nonsense metaphor that serves neither women nor men. The idea that there’s an imaginary pendulum that has been swung in women’s favour promotes a lazy binary thinking that can only view gender work as a Zero Sum Game where there’s always a winner and always a loser.
It has been about pushing an imaginary pendulum back towards men. We’re not interested in playing Zero Sum Games where there’s a winner or a loser.
The Men’s Network stands for a world where every man, woman, girl and boy can fulfil their greatest potential – and our focus is on helping men and boys to overcome the barriers and disadvantages that they face.
This means doing better for boys in schools; helping men live longer, happier, healthier lives; supporting more dads to be more involved in their children’s lives; making sure boys and girls have male role models in their lives and making the world a safer place for all by keeping men and boys safe.
And it means doing this in a way that the whole team wins.
Doing better for men and boys doesn’t mean women have to lose out.
When working with one gender the enemy is not the other gender. There doesn’t have to be a winner or a loser when working with women or men because if we do it well then everyone wins.
But if there is no pendulum and the other gender isn’t the enemy then why does it seem like such a fight some times?
Well it’s because the enemies we are fighting are huge. The enemy is poverty, the enemy is poor health, the enemy is a bad education, the enemy is crime and disorder and the enemy is violence and abuse.
And if you try telling someone who’s committed to making the world a better place for women and girls – who quite rightly cares about women’s pay, or girls’ access to education worldwide, or women’s cancers, or domestic violence and sexual abuse – you try telling that person that there’s a pendulum and it’s swung too far now – they would nor surprisingly think you were a little bit mad.
And that’s why the pendulum metaphor doesn’t work because if you’re taking on addressing big problems like poverty and violence then your pendulum can never swing far enough.
And that’s why we need new way of looking at gender issues that empower us to look at issues like women’s pay or boys’ education or men’s life expectancy or men’s risk of offending or violence against women and girls in a way that acknowledges that:
Women are not the only ones to experience poor pay and poverty – and most men and women are not in poverty
Boys are not the only ones to get a bad education – and most boys and girls get good results
Men are not the only ones to die young – and most men and women live long, happy, healthy lives
Women are not the only victims of violence – and most men and women are neither perpetrators nor victims of crime and violence
I don’t know what a world where every man, women, girl and boy can fulfil their greatest potential looks like because we haven’t created yet.
And I do know it’s possible.
And I also know that swinging back and forth on a metaphorical pendulum playing Zero Sum Games where there’re winners and losers is NOT the way to make that possibility a reality.
If we must have a metaphor for working with men and women that works for everyone then I’d much rather we sit in a rowing boat than swing on a pendulum.
A rowing boat works really well when all the oars are in perfect balance. If you just pull on the oars on your side, everyone in the boat goes round and round in circles.
So if you’re serious about making a difference for men or women or both then I have a request – will you please step away from the pendulum, hop in the boat and grab an oar!
And don’t all rush to one side now……………”
Glen Poole, Strategic Director, The Men’s Network

I was responding to Carol Conway’s comment “violence against men? not so much”

So much, Carol. Open a newspaper, read a history book or just wait til next weekend when there’ll no doubt be another beating or stabbing of a man

Bummer.

No Shanti, I object to selecting which victims of violence warrant sympathy

Why have a dance to end “violence against women” when you could just dance to end violence? It’s because you, Carol and CABK think male victims are less worthy

Chuck your point is pure rubbish. But you are entitled to your opinion so I presume you are currently writing strongly worded letters along the lines of the following:

Why have international AIDS day to heighten awareness about AIDS. This should be international every single bad disease in the world, you just don’t care about cancer because you have your aids day, you don’t care about MS and Depression and suicide you awful World AIDS day organisers.

And what about those organisers of daffodil day? How dare they have a day for cancer. That should also be for every single disease. Those awful cancer societies who don’t care about AIDS.

Don’t get me started on Breast Cancer Awareness pink ribbons. Those awful people also don’t care about every other terrible disease like Pakinsons and AIDS and so on?

I mean this must be your opinion right Chuck? You just said that women organised a dance against violence for women because they don’t care about male victims and think they’re less worthy? So you must agree that anyone who organises anything dealing with a specific topic must hate everything else right?

Or is it just that you don’t believe any cause to do with women is important enough to merit its own individual focus?

When are you organising this day against violence then Chuck given you feel so passionately about it?

How long did it take you to write that? I didn’t read it but it looks like it took you ages.

Eh..yeah but violence against women is a big enough deal to be an issue in its own right, I’m not saying violence doesn’t happen against men but that’s not the issue here!

The issue is if you had an “International aids day for women with aids,” it would be unfair and unequal. Obviously the idea of this is absurd! Yet a day for “female rape and domestic violence” is ok when it would be just as valid and inclusive if it was a day for “rape and domestic violence in society”

That’s the issue. That’s why it’s misandrous!

“Women’s issues”. Women are a majority treated like a minority we are 51% of the planets population for every 98 men in this country there are 100 women. We are your friends mothers daughters sisters cousins and we are being raped, beaten & killed and do not have equal rights so get used to hearing about it .

Brilliant.

While violence against men is an important issue, it’s more likely to occur outside the home and to be taken seriously by authorities. In the last two weeks, I have had a manager at social services tell me that domestic violence is a “family matter” and had a rape survivor told by police that “they weren’t there to be her counsellor.”

I want to live in a world where everyone of any gender reporting a crime is treated with respect and dignity, so I will be participating in the flashmob. Would be great if someone organised one for male survivors of violence – maybe some of the posters here should take that kind of positive action?

Totally agree with Nick and Mick.

@Kinet1c, spot on.

CABK, Daffodil day and World AIDS day embrace ALL victims of those diseases, they don’t select the ones they want to help based on how they were born

The overwhelming majority of the homeless are male. Should the Simon Community stop providing services to women?

And I wouldn’t support a charity that exclusively helped men, let alone start one, because I think the best way to promote equality is to practise it

Chuck – I think that you only want a certain version of equality.

You don’t want huge increases in the numbers of men being raped and sexually assaulted to the extent that walking home alone in the dark or in a lonely street causes men to constantly look over their shoulder to make sure no woman will come up to them and assault them, or to feel completely powerless that a woman they know who is stronger than them could rape and violate them and nothing can be done to stop it. That would be equality where rape and sexual assault affect countless men and women, where it doesn’t discriminate on gender like AIDS.

You just want men and women to be treated equally on this topic in terms of media coverage and events, even though rape and sexual assault affect far far more women than men and is an endemic problem in countries where women have no rights at all such as in the middle east, India and Africa.

No matter how you try to distort the reality (which in doing so in itself is incredibly disrespectful towards women) there is no equality for women when it comes to sexual assault and rape. They are unequivocally raped and subject to sexual assault and domestic violence more than men are. And that is the reason why this day came about and other campaigns exist. To try and do something about this.

And this in no way takes away from the anguish and distress of any man who has ever been raped or sexually assaulted. But its just not as huge an issue for males worldwide as it is for females. That’s just how it is, again no matter how you try to distort it.

I’m not going to reply any further on this thread, its incredibly disappointing that you and other male posters can’t see past your own concerns about yourself to have sympathy and compassion for women, to think that ANYTHING to help against rape and sexual assault of a woman is a good thing and something you should wholeheartedly support for the sake of your wives/girlfriends/sisters/mothers.

No Chuck, when 1 in 3 men is raped in their lifetimes, then it’ll be equal. But I’m sure no one wants that, and women don’t like the statistic that a third of us will experience rape – we would like to reduce it..
As for violence, yes, a fraction of men will experience domestic violence – which is wrong, but again – thankfully they don’t experience nearly as much as women do, and that’s a good thing.. Women would just like to have as small a fraction as men..

The whole point of this is to level the playing field and encourage equality, seriously – if the stats on rape and domestic violence against women were as small as they are for men then we could all work together to end rape and violence against anyone, but for the time being we have a long way to go before we get there.

The majority of violence committed against men is committed by other men, and often as a result of excessive alcohol. It’s an issue that needs to be addressed, but it’s a completely separate issue to this one..
I swear, if it was a drive for beating ovarian cancer you would have a whinge that it wasn’t about men..

@ Mick Kenny – I know it was a quote, but that guy summed it up perfectly, that’s the ideology behind feminism as far as I am concerned, it should be equal, but we have to strive for equality rather than treating like a battle of the sexes like that quote says..

Think you might have struck the nail on the head there Shanti!!

You will fight, and you will be right.

Where’s the point in that? (not trying to be rude, this is in fact genuine curiosity) Surely a better example of equality would be for you to join in?
Devastated I won’t be able to make it to any of these, but I shall be dancing around my house tomorrow night in solidarity!

That’s a pity. Everyone needs to be informed on the prevalence of rape and sexual/domestic abuse against women if we are going to take steps to change this awful part of our culture.

I hope you at least managed to read the article and absorb what it says instead of immediately getting defensive about how men weren’t mentioned in it.

I would be happy enough with that.

Its statements like that that get mens hackles up, its not men vs women, not all men rape, abuse and beat women.

I will fight for male rights because i have 2 sons whom i love and dont want them to be raped or abused.

Why should a woman be afraid to get men’s hackles up? It’s this attitude that boggles my mind, don’t upset the man whatever you do. I have more male friends than female ones & will defend anybody who is mistreated but I will not as a woman be afraid to speak my mind.

Hannah we live in society together and i agree with Karla comment this tit for tat is a waste of energy. these issues should be tickled together as they effect both genders.

Truly – as long as we keep seeing the world in make vs female roles we will never get anywhere. We are all people, and we are all individuals, we are supposed to be held as equal but we have a long way to go before this is true in practice. Men are frequently frozen out of their children’s lives due to the sexist notion that mothers should automatically raise them, women suffer more from violence and rape. We have a long way to go, but we need to keep away from the division and try to work together. It’s sad that some men on this thread are so myopic about what they perceive as an erosion of their rights that they fail to see that true feminism is about equality – for women AND men, as opposed to more rights for women – which is nonsense (the over zealous feminists who seek that piss me off too).

No problem Michael, I’ve had a great time laughing at all the jokes. Really cheered me up to hear jokes about periods, smacking women and them belonging in the kitchen after reading about women being abused, raped and violently assaulted. Cheers.

Michael, the point is that it’s not really appropriate to make jokes in this context. Why you feel the need to try to bait people who are reading a story about sexual assault is beyond me.

Yeah – how many people were making jokes on the Jamie Bulger articles?
There’s a time and a place, this ain’t it..

Really. You think rape and sexual abuse is a joke? If that was your daughter would you still think so??

For Michael

…. well done

Class!!

Maybe you guys that make those stupid comments have dark tendencies. Who knows what ye get up to at home with your own women. !! Maybe you like ‘a bit of rough’ !!

And a kick in the b@@@s for you! If you have any. Which is highly unlikely. Lol.