ALCOHOL AND CHRISTMAS. It’s the iconic festive paring that can be harder to separate than turkey and ham, but this year I’m ready to give it a try.
Like me, you probably grew up with more casual attitudes to alcohol, especially on Christmas Day. Be it Baileys for breakfast or a glass of Buck’s Fizz (the peak 90s sophisticated tipple) at each house visited on Christmas morning, then driving on to the next relative before home for more with the Christmas dinner, it tended to be a case of anything goes.
Since then, attitudes towards alcohol consumption have changed. We better understand the negative health implications, both physical and mental alcohol can have. In fact, Irish people are drinking on average almost one-third less alcohol than they did in 2001. Binge-drinking is still a problem, however, with one in four drinkers (25%) consuming six or more standard drinks when they drank alcohol in the past 30 days, as well as at home drinking being on the rise, according to DrinkAware.
Alongside the statistics, the growing trend of being ‘sober curious’ has gained traction in recent years. I can almost hear your collective eye rolls at the phrase. I know because I once was that eye-roller. Yet, over the last year, I’ve joined the ranks of people who are taking a more mindful approach to their alcohol consumption. Yes, my name is Niamh and I’m going to have a sober curious Christmas this year.
According to DrinkAware’s 2024 barometer research, “a record 37% of adults indicated that they wish to drink less often, reflecting a growing awareness of alcohol’s effects on health and well-being. The same percentage of adults state they have made small positive changes to their drinking habits in the past 30 days.”
Anecdotally, the appetite for drinking seems to be declining. People are reporting their friends are drinking less when out and about, hating the feeling of being hungover and the negative impact it can have on health in general. Olivia Farrelly, alcohol-free mentor agrees there is a shift happening on a wider level. “People are looking for a different way of socialising and my sense of it is that they are just done with hangovers and the lethargy, hangxiety and exhaustion that comes the next day,” she explains. “I think the rise of alcohol-free options and the growing conversation about the health harms associated with alcohol are helping this sober curious movement gain traction.”
Being sober curious is a marked difference from abstinence. You’re not declaring your teetotalling intentions, you’re simply thinking more about why you’re deciding to have a drink. Is it simply out of habit? Is it because it’s Christmas and everyone is having a drink? Is it to fit in with the crowd, or to dodge an interrogation? Or is it because you really do want to have a drink?
As I found out in January of this year, when I decided to evaluate my relationship with alcohol, finding the answer to those questions can be life-changing. It can be the small spark that allows you to escape those toxic habits you are desperately trying to alter but can’t find a way out.
In my case, I hated the feeling of being hungover, I hated not feeling fully present for my children if I’d indulged in Wine O’Clock the night before, and I hated that drinking at home had crept in more and more since Covid.
After a year of being sober curious, I’m much more mindful about my reasons for drinking. I often don’t bother, because I didn’t want to in the first place, and find myself feeling healthier and freer. I don’t foresee my first sober curious Christmas being a huge hurdle, because I’ve gotten used to drinking in a more mindful way and asking the question if I really want it or not.
However, for those who have a desire to be more sober curious this Christmas for the first time, there’s no doubt it can be a challenge. Be it Christmas drinks with colleagues, family, friends, people you’ve not seen in Donkey’s years, the 12 pubs of Christmas, or the annual Christmas Eve and Stephen’s Day pilgrimage to the pub, alcohol is interwoven into the fabric of the season.
Even if you manage to stick to your sober curious guns, there’s no getting away from the fact that you’ll likely be grilled Spanish inquisition style if you decline a drink this season – “ah go on you’ll have one”- or at the very least, you’ll likely face raised eyebrows and confused whispers at your decision not to imbibe.
“Are you the designated driver?”
“Is she a bit of an alcoholic, or what?”
“He must be on antibiotics?”
Or if you’re a woman, “Are you pregnant? “
“No. I just don’t want to feel like I’ve to have a drink at every single social occasion this Christmastime.”
It can be enough to make you abandon your plans and put the sober curious hat back on the shelf until January.
But in another way, I’d argue Christmas is the perfect occasion to do it because it’s the time when we often end up drinking not because we want to, but because it’s expected or it’s a habit. Stopping to ask why, might be the catalyst you need. Oliva Farrelly agrees. “It’s actually a brilliant time,” she assures. “Christmas is jam-packed with social events and meeting up with friends. It’s the perfect opportunity to experiment with it and see how you feel. It’s all about trialling it out, and seeing if it’s for you. I did my first alcohol-free stint in December 2017. Never in a million years did I think I’d end up alcohol-free, but here I am almost seven years down the road, and giving up alcohol is still the greatest thing I have ever done,” she says.
Plus, the drinks market is catching on. Non-alcoholic or low-alcohol versions of everything from beer, stout, gin and prosecco are widely available, generally taste great, and leave you feeling like you’re not missing out on anything.
If you do decide to dip a toe in the sober curious waters this festive season, here are Olivia’s tips to help you along the way:
1 Stock up on delicious alcohol-free drinks, like sparkling teas, kombuchas, or alcohol-free wines and beers so you can be tippling away at these at home.
2 Let people know in advance that you’re trying something new and won’t be drinking. They might not be happy, but they’ll get used to it.
3 Give it a decent chance. Whether it’s a 30-day or a 100-day break, give it enough time to see results. You won’t be disappointed with the clarity, energy and productivity it produces.
4 Connect with others on the same journey. There are so many online communities of people just like you who are looking for more than alcohol has to give them. You’ll be able to share ideas, be accountable, and support each other along the way.
5 Think of it as an experiment, try not to take it too seriously and just enjoy it. Christmas without alcohol is not easy, especially here in Ireland but come January when everyone else is in bits, exhausted, and bloated you’ll be delighted with your abundance of energy and all the cash you’ve saved.
Niamh O’Reilly is a freelance writer and wrangler of two small boys.
If you’ve been affected by any of the issues in this piece, feel free to visit hse.ie/alcohol or call the HSE Drugs and Alcohol Helpline at 1800 459 459 for confidential support.
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