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Am I being a bad parent... by telling our four-year-old she's not allowed to eat meat?

This week, a vegetarian reader is feeling conflicted by her daughter’s requests to try meat.

EACH WEEK IN our series, Am I Being A Bad Parent?, we hear from a reader who can’t figure out what to do about a tricky parenting situation.

To get a balanced view, we put the dilemma to a group of Irish parents, keeping things anonymous to encourage honest answers.

Making sure your child has a healthy and well-rounded diet is one of the most important things a parent can do, but there’s always going to be some pushback along the way.

This week, one reader is wondering how to handle her four-year-old daughter’s sudden request to eat meat like her friend does, despite being raised as a vegetarian alongside her parents. 

Have a parenting question you’d like some other mums and dads to weigh in on? Let us know anonymously here!

This week’s dilemma

I’ve raised my four-year-old daughter as a vegetarian since birth and it has been plain sailing. My husband and I have been vegetarian since our teens, so we’re very familiar with the vegetarian diet and aware of reaching our required intake of vitamins without meat. Being raised in a vegetarian household, our daughter has never had an issue with not eating meat. However, she’s recently started going on playdates and seeing other kids eat meat and she’s now asking for it at home – and we don’t know what to do. Am I being unreasonable by not giving my daughter meat, even if she wants it?

Our anonymous readers’ responses

You’re being a bit unreasonable. It sounds like this could present a good opportunity to talk to your daughter about the different kinds of foods people eat, and why you have made the choice not to eat meat. But I do think it would be unreasonable to not at least offer her the opportunity to try some meat at home. The older she gets, the more important it is that she can have some say in those kinds of decisions.

I don’t think you are being unreasonable. Explain to your daughter why you and your husband have made this choice for your family, much as you have made choices for your family on other matters. It sounds like you have both been very responsible in how you manage your family’s nutritional needs and it’s something to be proud of. If you are feeling like you don’t want to be prescriptive about it as she gets older, allow her to sample meat on play dates or at parties. There will be plenty of cocktail sausages in her future at classmates’ birthdays! That’s a good compromise.

Yes, you’re being unreasonable. You and your husband have chosen to be vegetarian – and your daughter deserves to be able to make that choice for herself too. She still is quite young and perhaps she may follow suit in the future and decide against eating meat like her parents, but until then I’d advise letting her explore eating meat if she chooses to.

So what’s the final tally? Is this reader being unreasonable?

Yes – 2

No – 1

Tell us your thoughts in the comments! Have a parenting question you want answered? Let us know anonymously in our survey here and we’ll put it to the real-life experts: your fellow mums and dads.

And want to win Powerscourt Hotel’s afternoon tea for two (plus a Carter Beauty gift to take home)? Enter here - and don’t forget to subscribe to our Family Newsletter below.

More: Am I being a bad parent… by giving in to my toddler’s tantrums too quickly?>

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