Steph Brady

EXPERTS ONCE CLAIMED that the human body simply wasn’t capable of running a four-minute mile; they were so sure that it created a psychological barrier to any attempt.

Then, on 6 May 1954, Roger Bannister ran a mile in 3 minutes 59.4 seconds. Within 46 days, another runner, John Landy, also broke the four-minute barrier. Over the following few years, dozens more athletes achieved what had once been considered impossible. Today, more than 2,000 runners have done it.

Human physiology didn’t evolve, but, once one person proved it was possible, the brain had a new reference point. The impossible became possible.

I work with incredibly capable individuals and teams who constantly talk themselves out of their own potential. We all do it, some of us more than others. A leader, manager or coach should become the bridge between fear and potential for their teams.

What is potential? It’s that great idea that you dismissed, a promotion that you held yourself back from. Potential is the gap between who you are today and what is possible tomorrow. Talking ourselves out of potential feels like logic, but it’s much more complex than that. 

Defining success

When we look at the components of success, we mostly see what’s on the outside:
talent, hard work, intelligence and great networking. Over my career I have become fascinated by the real driving force of success, which is the brain and the stories it tells us.

Our brains can sometimes hate change and see it as a potential threat. They are constantly scanning for threats and for evidence that our beliefs are true; this is a factor in how long humans have survived. Don’t get me wrong, survival is great! However, in the workplace surviving does not equal thriving. In fact, being in survival mode often gets in the way of thriving.

When we are scanning, we are absorbing the world through our own specific mindset. Think of mindset as a pair of glasses with coloured lenses. The glasses you put on affect how the world appears to you. The “lenses” are made up of many things, most of which we are not aware of. Things like deep beliefs and values. These “lenses” therefore affect how we experience the world.

For example, if our “lenses” contain the deep belief that we are terrible in interviews, what will they see as they scan an opportunity for a promotion or an exciting new role? They will see something very different from a person who has “lenses” that contain the belief that an interview is just one part of a process.

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As with all perceived threats for we humans, the brain scans for that threat, and our glasses may be amplifying or creating threats that don’t exist. Our bodies react almost instantaneously to that threat. Our brains can’t tell the difference between real or imagined threats and send the nervous system into fight, flight or freeze.

For the person who sees job interviews as a threat that could look like not applying for the role; getting irritable pre interview, showing up as a very small version of themselves; forgetting their examples and struggling to find the right words.

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Believing in yourself

When I was early in my career, I found it terrifying to speak to more than four people in a group. I would become nauseous and shake with nerves. The first time I had to stand up and speak to a group of 20, my legs were shaking so badly I couldn’t walk back to my seat.

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Then came a threat of redundancy unless I was willing to take on a new role which included training groups of 20+ people, 2–3 times a week. The only way to overcome was to understand myself and try to get to the point where it no longer terrified me. That’s what developed my fascination how our unhelpful thinking patterns can get in our way. A huge part of my job is now keynote speaking on topics that fill me with passion and joy. My lenses have changed so much that I now find it fun to speak to big and small audiences.

The goal isn’t to ignore reality; it’s to question whether the story you’re telling yourself is the only possible interpretation. I work with people and teams to break this cycle; here are some of the tools I use:

• Name the story. Get extremely specific with the exact story. Without assumptions or judgment, what is the story I am telling in this situation?

• Change the proverbial glasses. This is deceptively simple. When you change the story, tell yourself a different one, notice how your body reacts.

• Create a delicious goal. Language is key here. Most of the goals I encounter are worded badly. They are threat-based goals. Our brains do not react well to them. For example, “I have to get better at interviews” is a threat goal. “I will become someone who enjoys talking about what I bring to the table” could be a delicious goal. Delicious goals are very personal, and they will create a sense of excitement and purpose when we hit on the right one.

• Make it sticky. Thinking a new thought once won’t make a change. We need to find ways to make it stick and create a new neural pathway, or shortcut to this thought. I personally use many including mantras, certain songs, mental rehearsal and visualisations.

Your brain does not like change, but it’s incredibly adaptive. If you teach it a new story, it will find new evidence to match. Try it and watch your nervous system and resources of potential thrive.